For those of you that don't know this about me, spending money is a commitment to what is purchased and its implications.
For example, I have not yet purchased a light set for my bike. Last week, after day light's savings ended, I rode home in semi-darkness. Only few points of the ride were truly scary, but it gives one pause. It is easier for me to request bike lights as a gift - something practical that I need and would use. If I purchase the set myself, I make a commitment - in my mind - to use them, ride in the dark more often. And I don't know if I'm ready for that. Aha!
So, you see why spending money to be Fingerprinted is a big step for me. It is a real commitment to the process of Adoption.
But, I know this is our path because obstacles jump in front of us whenever we take a step. Three months ago, the day after we started reading through the application requirements, we received a 20 day notice to vacate, throwing us into a tailspin of house-hunting on an impossible schedule. That crisis was averted - Praise be to God - but the steps (and therefore challenges) have only begun.
Last night, several issues tried to stop us from going down to the Police Station. First of all, Bryce came home late - not his fault, but it happened. We had 20 minutes to eat and get out the door...which we accomplished, but then, in haste to clean up, a sauce bottle dropped to the floor, spilling glass and tastiness all over the floor - another 5 minutes gone. I quietly cursed Satan for so obviously getting in the way.
Fingerprinting is only offered at specific times; we had 20 minutes left. We sped down the hill to the station. The whole building was dark, but it's the Dark Season in Seattle these days, when the sun sadly goes down before 5pm, so I didn't worry. Three cars were parked in the lot. The front door was open, but not the second security door. The window was closed - they closed early! I was disappointed. It takes me awhile to work up the courage to take steps like this one...and not completing the step is a let down.
Even after writing the date three times during the day, hearing special Veteran's programs on NPR, reading FB friends grateful statements to those who serve our country, I did not remember it was a holiday until my small group members pointed it out!
Foiled this time - but, next week is coming...
Oiy! How frustrating! It's hard to remember these holidays (or the fact that they affect which businesses are open) when we don't benefit from them. I forget the Monday holidays ALL THE TIME, since it's just a regular Monday for me and I'm trying to get things done.
ReplyDeleteI think this "money = commitment" thing is actually very admirable. I think it's something that is necessary if you are trying to go against the grain of consumerism. You want to be sure you need and will make good use of something before you invest in it. And I guess in the case of adoption, this commitment may help you push through the fears and second guessing that is likely to come up throughout this process.